


I am fucked up but so are you

by Lyliiwolf



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Bottom!Peter, Caught, Dacryphilia, Love, M/M, Smut, even super parents, parents ruin things, sexual asphyxiation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-16
Updated: 2013-03-16
Packaged: 2017-12-05 10:32:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/722059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyliiwolf/pseuds/Lyliiwolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After completing a job and visiting Matt; Wade and Peter enter a completely empty Avengers tower. Things get a bit heated up and they get caught by Peter’s parents who learns something about their son that they really didn’t need to know.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I am fucked up but so are you

“Deadpool get out of the way!” Peter yelled as bullets went flying past them.

“Die you mutant mutherfuckers!” The woman firing the bullet’s yelled.

“Why do women all feel the need to carry a gun? Why the fuck can’t I get a job with a woman who doesn’t carry one?” Wade complained while sidestepping a bullet.

“Why did you drag me along with you?” Peter asked angrily.

“I didn’t drag you anywhere. We were going to Hell’s Kitchen any-” Wade got cut off as a stray bullet hit him in the back of the head and fell face first on the pavement. 

“Fuck!” Peter exclaimed while running over to Wade’s body. He stuck his fingers in the whole the bullet had created and tried to pull out the bullet before the whole closed up. He knew Wade hated having bullet’s stuck in his head and pulling them out of his ears later. Peter vaguely heard footsteps behind him.

“Your turn motherfucker!” The woman says while holding the gun to Peter’s head. Peter just sighs and shoots a web at her with his free hand. The web came out with such force it knocked the gun out of the woman’s hand and sent her flying to the near by wall where she stuck. 

“Peter it hurt’s” Wade whined under Peter’s ministrations. 

“I know baby, I know but we got to get the bullet out just hold on for me” Peter whispered softly while still digging around for the bullet. Wade let out little whimper’s until Peter finally got a whole of the bullet and yanked it out. Wade groaned and rolled over as his head healed up.

“I don’t give a fuck what anyone says. Being shot hurt’s like a bitch” He groaned as Peter pulls him up. 

“I don’t think anyone would argue with you on that” Peter said. Wade grimaced and picked up the gun. 

“Trust me some asshole that thinks he is bad ass will. They always do” He walked over to the woman who had a look of pure terror on her face.

“Please don’t kill me” The woman begged. Wade smiled behind his mask.

“Well Lisa. May I call you Lisa? Well it doesn’t matter because I’m gonna call you that anyway. You didn’t seem to have a problem with trying to kill me or my friend here so why should I have a problem with killing you?” He asked.

“How do you know my name?” She asked. Wade clicked his tongue.

“Ms Lisa answering a question with a question now that’s just not good, but since it’s a final request I’ll humor you. I know who you are because I make it my business to know all about dirty people like you. I know you killed your husband and drowned your newborns. You robbed a bank and killed any hostages and just last month you burned down an orphanage with children still in it. The last thing I know about you is that today is your last day living on this earth” He explained all this with humor in his voice and stuck the gun in her mouth. 

“Lalalalala” Wade turned around to see Peter facing in the opposite direction with his hands over his ears repeating “La” over and over. Wade sighed and turned back to Lisa who was now crying hysterically. Her sobs muffled by the gun in her mouth. Something clicked in Wade’s mind and he bit back a groan of arousal. It wasn’t that he was attracted to women (he had discovered that was never going to happen), but more so the fact that he made her cry. He broke her enough to make her show an emotion so pure it brought tears. He felt himself hardening in his suit and jerked the gun out of her mouth. 

“Today is your lucky day” he said before turning around and walking back to Peter. 

“You’re not going to kill me?” She asked surprise evident in her voice. Wade shook his head.

“Nope. Spiderman let’s go” Peter took his hands off his ears and ran up to Wade who was walking away. It was only when Wade hears Lisa sigh with relief did he smile under his mask. “Just kidding!” He turned around quickly firing a bullet that hit Lisa right between the eyes. 

“Christ, Pool! You could have warned me. I wasn’t ready for that. I mean I thought you were being all good and going to wait for the police, and- Ughh!” Peter finished his rant at lost for words. 

“Yeah yeah, now go get your web off that thing spidey. Can’t have the cops thinking that one of the worlds most clean cut superhero’s had anything to do with a murder.” Wade joked while walking over to the body. Peter followed him and began to pull off the web. 

“ Maybe if we’re lucky the cops will think it was a suicide” Peter says hopefully as he pulls the rest of the webbing down and the body falls to the ground with a sickening “squish”

“Or they will know that someone kill her and just basically won’t give a fuck because she got what was coming to her” Wade said as he threw the gun on the ground.

“Well aren’t you just a bundle of sunshine” Peter said sarcastically.

“You are my sunshine” Wade began to sing.

“Stop.”

“My only sunshine”

“Pool!”

“You make me happy”

“You’re singing it like an octave to high!”

“When skies are grey”

“This is not funny!”

“You’ll never know dear”

“No!”

“How much I love you”

“My ear’s Pool, my ears!”

“Please don’t take my sunshine away” On the last part Wade lifted up part of his and Peter’s mask and pulled Peter in for a sloppy kiss.

“You didn’t finish the whole song asshole!” A familiar voice yelled jokingly from above. Wade pulled away and looked up grinning.

“Well isn’t the blind Devil himself. Did you come to sniff out or pheromones since you can’t actually see us kissing?” Wade asked. Daredevil sighed and climbed down to them. 

“What the hell are you guys doing in Hell’s kitchen?” Matt asked ignoring Wades comment. Peter smiled.

“We came to see you numbskull”

“Yeah you are the only one out of the three of us that can legally buy alcohol” Wade chimes in. 

“I thought your parents had an endless supply Spidey?” Matt asked.

“Well they did but dad’s a recovering alcoholic now, and pop will barely keep rubbing alcohol on the premises.” Peter answered. Matt grumbled something under his breath.

“Well come on” He said before running off with Wade and Peter on his tail.

__________________________________________________________________

“How come all you ever have is crappy wine coolers?” Wade asked while taking a sip of his drink and setting it on his mask on the coffee table.

“You could have had a fucking beer like Peter” Matt said while flopping on his small couch next to Wade. 

“Beer is for light weights and red neck dads.” Wade replied as Peter walks in with a Budweiser in his hand and sat in his lap.

“I am not a light weight. It’s just easier to wash out the smell of beer from my old men.” He said before taking a swig.

“I see that your bruise is healing up Peter. What did you tell your dad’s this time?” Matt asked. Peter blushed.

“You know the usual attacked by crazy people”

“Speaking off dad’s when is little Peter’s curfew?” Wade asked while ruffling Peter’s hair. Peter shoved his hand away.

“An hour before yours pervert” Peter answered laughing. 

“Aww the swinger’s daddy gave them a curfew.” Matt cooed.

“And where is your dad to give you a curfew Matt?” Wade asked coolly.

“Wade really!?” Peter exclaimed in shock. Wade looked at him innocently then back at Matt who was clenching his jaw. 

“Matt come one man I was kid-”

“Save it faggot. I’m going to go get another drink” Matt said angrily while pushing himself off the couch. He held out his hand and used it to lead him to the kitchen. 

“Apologies” Peter hissed once Matt was in the kitchen.

“It was a joke” Wade insisted,

“Not a good one. So get up and fix this” Peter insisted.

“Fine” Wade sighed and got up causing Peter to fall on the hardwood floor. He walked into the kitchen where Matt was leaning against the counter a beer in his hand. He sneered when Wade came closer.

“Came to make another dickhead comment?” He asked. Wade shrugged then realized that Matt couldn’t see it.

“You know they fly out of my mouth faster than the speed of light” Wade said trying to make a joke of the situation.

“Maybe you should keep Peter’s dick in your mouth to block it” Matt growled with venom in his voice. Wade put his hand on Matt’s shoulder and Matt flinched. Well that was new, but Wade still didn’t move his hand.

“Matt. Matthew. You know I didn’t mean anything. It was just a crappy joke that should have never left my mouth.” Wade said while giving Matt’s shoulder a squeeze.

“It should have never entered your brain” Matt said while shrugging off his hand. He put both hands on Matt’s shoulders and faced him head on.

“If you don’t forgive me right now I will be forced to pull out all the stops” Wade warned.

“Wade chill I’m not even that mad any more” Matt said with a sigh while trying to shake Wade’s hands off but only causing Wade to tighten his grip.

“Nope you’re still mad I can feel it in my soul. Oh baby, I know sometimes it’s gonna rain” Wade started to sing completely off pitch.

“Wade seriously dude I’m not mad just let go o-”

“But Matt, can we make up now?”

“Wade I forgive you just shut up.”

“Cause I can’t sleep through the pain”

“Wade stop. My ear‘s are super sensitive and they are bleedin-”

“Matt, I don’t want to go to bed mad at you. And I don’t want you to go to bed mad at me. No I don-” Matt put his hand over Wade’s mouth and smiling.

“I forgive you ass nugget. Plus I’m sorry for calling you a faggot. I know how it makes Peter think back to when he was getting bullied even if he doesn’t admit it. Now I’m going to move my hand and you’re going to speak. Not sing but speak understand?” Matt asked. Wade nodded and Matt slowly lifted his hand.

“So you care that Peter would be upset but not me?” Wade asked pretending to be offended.

“Of course because you have no feelings” Matt said jokingly. Wade was about to make a retort when Peter’s voice came from the living room.

“Guys come on the real Housewives of Atlanta is on… And it’s a new episode” He called happily. Matt and Wade both looked at each other before breaking out into grins.

“Coulson” The both said at the same time. 

_________________________________________________________________

“I can’t believe Kim had the nerve to do that. Like puhlhhhleaze girl get your head out of your butt and get some humility. If you’re gonna mess up at least admit to it” Peter complained while pulling off his mask and jumping into the couch of the Avenger’s tower stomach down. 

“Peter your gayness is showing” Wade joked while taking off his mask and flopping down beside him. Peter blushed.

“Shut up” He said while burrowing his face into a pillow. Wade chuckled and ran his fingers through Peter’s hair.

“It’s so quiet in here. It’s never quiet here. Even at 3 o’clock in the morning people are still up and loud as hell” Wade said confused. Peter lifted his head off of a pillow.

“You’re right. Jarvis where is everyone?” He asked.

“Your parent’s are on a date and won’t be back till later. Sir Banner and Mister Barton went out drinking. Mrs. Romanov just left to go pick them. And Master Thor is not on this planet” Jarvis answered.

“Thanks Jarvis also can you turn off the security features for this room?” Peter asked.

“Of course sir”

“Ohhh so we have to whole house to ourselves?” Wade asked suggestively. Peter flipped over and pulled him down for a long kiss. 

All the other kid’s with the pumped up kicks

Peter groaned as his phone started to ring. “Ignore it” Wade said while trailing kisses down Peter’s throat. “I can’t” Peter murmured while pushing the Wade away and pulling the phone out of his back pocket. He mouthed sorry before clicking answer. “Hey Gwen” He answered brightly. Wade huffed and leaned back into the couch. He vaguely heard part of Peter’s conversation while his brain started going a mile a minute. He started thinking about the crying Lisa, and how hot Peter looks when he cries. He then formulated an idea, an idea that even he thought was risky but if it back fired he knew how to get back on Peter’s good side. “Yeah bye Gwen. Mhmm Love you too. Don’t kill the cat” Peter hung up the phone and smiled at Wade “So where were we?” He asked while crawling on top of him. Wade chuckled. 

“Little Peter. So desperate for a little attention that he will show affection to anyone. Even people that are clearly stringing you around.” Wade said smirking. Peter’s smile dropped and he looked confused.

“What in the world are you talking about?” Wade gave Peter a dead pan look.

“I’m talking about Gwen. God for the son of a genius you are pretty dense. No wonder she left you.” Peter frowned

“She didn’t leave me. It was a mutual breakup” Wade shrugged.

“Call it what you will you two are not together anymore, and here you are trying to keep a pointless friendship. It’s a wonder I she can stand your voice. I know I can’t” Peter sat up on his haunches and his cheeks and eyes were starting to turn red…

“Well if you really feel that way…” He trailed off not able to finish the sentence.

“It’s a wonder we’re still together. If Matt wasn’t straight I doubt we still would be.”

“Are you fu-” Wade held up his hand.

“Don’t interrupt I’m not done with my thought. What I was getting ready to say was that you need me though. I mean since your blood relatives died to get away from you and a-”

“Get the fuck out”

Slap

“I said don’t interrupt me” Wade said with clench teeth. Peter clutched the cheek that Wade had slapped and pursed his lips together. Tears drizzled down his cheek and Wade could see pain and hurt in his eyes but no fear unlike everyone else he has ever made clear. Also something else he couldn’t really place at that moment. “Sorry baby but that’s the way is.” Wade said before grabbing Peter and crushing their lips together. Surprisingly Peter kissed him back with as much force and didn’t struggle when Wade pulled him on top of him. He began to take off Peter’s suit slowly. Every time he got started showing skin he rubbed small circles over it. Hoping that the feeling could translate into apologies to those hurtful things that he said. He easily lifted Peter up and slipped off the bottom part of his suit. He was crying harder now but he wasn’t telling Wade no and he had an erection too so he kept going. He stood up and began to take off his own suit. He was glad he left his swords at home but he sat a gun down on the table. 

“Wade” Peter said softly still crying. He sat back down and started to kiss over Peter’s chest.

“Shhhh” he murmured before flicking his tongue over Peter’s nipple and causing him to moan. He did the same to the other nipple causing Peter to wrap his arms around Wade and breathe heavily on his neck. Wade gently pulled Peter’s arms off of him and pulled him up then pushed him down on his knees on the floor. Peter looked up at him. The tears were stopping but his cheeks were still wet and his nose was red to. Wade smiled down at him and rubbed circles over his cheek. He couldn’t help but think that it wasn’t fair that anyone should look so beautiful after crying but Peter somehow pulled it off. He moved his hand and put his length in front of him… “Open” he commanded. Peter did as he was told and let Wade stick his length in his mouth. Peter closed his mouth and just sat there staring up at Wade with a look of innocence that made Wade narrow his eye’s. “I’m not fucking your face” He said. Peter murmured something and he closed his eyes and groaned. He looked down and Peter was smirking around him and starting slowly taking all of him in. Once his nose touched Wade’s waist he sucked and hollowed his cheeks. Wade moaned and he tugged on Peter’s hair. Peter murmured again and Wade had to resist the urge to thrust. Peter pulled off and slowly licked off some of Wade’s precum. This time Wade didn’t hold back and thrusted into Peter’s mouth while holding Peter still. When Wade’s length touched the back of Peter’s throat and Peter swallowed and Wade quickly pulled out. He was close and he didn’t want to cum during a BJ. He picked Peter back up and laid him down on the couch. Peter lay back on the couch and opened his legs wantonly causing a groan from Wade. He pulled a bottle of lube out of his suit (you never know when your going to need it) He positioned himself between Peter’s leg. He drizzled the lube on his finger’s and was about to enter them into Peter when he tensed. He gently rubbed his fingers over Peter’s muscles until Peter’s cock was twitching and he had relaxed. He slowly insert’s one finger in Peters opening and began to stretch him out slowly. He always started out slow so that he could watch all of Peter’s faces he made and all his sounds that he made. He was rolling his hips onto Wade’s finger and closing his eye’s.

“Wade please more” Peter moaned. Wade smirked and inserted two more fingers and Peter bucked his hips and hissed in pleasure pain. He thrusted a few times and curled his fingers continually hitting his prostate and making him cry out. “Wade please I’m gonna.” Peter warned. He sighed and moved his fingers. While he would love to make Peter cum just from fingering him he knew that there wasn’t on the top ten lists of Peter’s favorite things. Plus there would be no round two because Peter became over sensitive very quickly and hated for clothes to even touch him after. Peter clenched around the sudden emptiness. “Wade” he groaned. 

“I know baby shh” He said as he began to poor lube over his length. He pushed his head slowly in until he was fully inside of him. He waited giving Peter a few minutes to adjust himself (because he was rather big) before pulling out completely and slamming back in. He kept a steady pace while leaning down and pressing kisses on his skin and biting down on the sensitive parts. Peter panted heavily and wrapped his legs around his waist a silent plea to speed up. Wade complied and gave him a kiss and Peter moaned into his mouth. He could feel Peter tightening around him and he pulled his mouth away. 

“Wade!” Peter screamed as a before he came. Wade placed both his hands on Peter’s throat and applied pressure while the boy road out his orgasm. Peter began making strangled sounds, threw back his head, closed his eyes, and bucked his hips. All of a sudden the pressure on Peter’s neck stopped and Wade abruptly pulled out. This didn’t stop Peter from finishing his orgasm but it kept him from the aftershock. It wasn’t until he heard a groan of pain did he open his eye’s. “Wade what gi-” He stopped abruptly when he saw his pop (Steve) holding Wade by the neck while his dad (Tony) punched him the face repeatedly. 

“Dad, Pop STOP!” He yelled while getting up on his knees. His dad stopped punching him but his pop didn’t let go of Wade’s neck and by the color he was turning he was applying a steady amount of pressure.

“What the hell Peter?” Tony asked confused. “I and your dad come home to see our son getting raped, and he want’s us to stop defending him.”

“I was not getting raped, and pop put him down!” Peter yelled again. Steve dropped Wade on the floor and he fell with a thud. Peter rushed off the couch and to his side. His nose was bleeding rather steadily and Peter pinched it and tipped his head back for him. 

“He wasn’t raping you? Peter we saw him. We saw what he was doing to you” Steve said angrily.

“It was pop. Consensual sex” Peter said angrily. Wade groaned and tried to lift up his head, but Peter tilted it with more force.

“But his hands were around your throat… We saw him choking you” Steve said. Peter began to blush and looked down.

“It’s because I like him too. I always ask for him too” He said quietly. Realization crossed over Tony’s face but Steve still looked confused.

“Why in the world would you ask him to choke you?” Steve asked. Tony put his hand Steve’s shoulder before Peter could answer.

“Don’t worry about it honey.” He turned his attention back to the kids. “I won’t both of your asses showered in separate fucking bathrooms and downstairs in twenty minutes in pajama’s. There will be bags outside the doors of the bathrooms and I want you to put your suits in it” Tony said in a no nonsense tone.

“Why do I need to .I don’t even live here?” Wade asked while lifting his head up and swatting away Peter’s hand. Tony narrowed his eyes at him.

“Just do it Wilson” He growled angrily before him and Steve walked upstairs. 

They all sat at the bar. Peter and Wade were both wearing a pair of sweat pant’s and a white t-shirt. Peter’s sweats were black and Wade’s were red it was there way to mourn the loss of their suits since they both know what the bags outside the door means. Steve and Tony sat across from them with grim expressions. 

“As you both know crime fighting is over for a very long time.” Steve started. Peter looked over at Tony who was tapping morse code into the bar.

Reason’s I shouldn’t kill my son’s boyfriend.

“I want web shooter, and swords.”

It would seriously upset my son.

“Why am I getting punished too I don’t live here?” Wade asked.

He can’t actually die

“Well Logan is out of town and we called him and decided that children that have … intercourse together get punished together. So you are spending the next month here.” Steve answered.

Of course beating him and knowing that it won’t kill him will relieve stress. Tony smiled creepily and Peter turned his attention back to Steve.

“Also both of you need to give me your car keys.”

“WHAT?! How are we going to get places if we can’t be Spiderman and dead pool?” Peter asked astonished. 

“You have Darcy and Honey bear is coming back tomorrow. I am sure they would love to drive you places.” Tony said smugly.

“Who is Honey bear?” Wade asked.

“Rhodey” Peter answered. 

“Plus you can still keep your mask.” Steve said not wanting to go into more detail. 

“Also bed room rules. Wade will be staying in your room but the door must be opened at all time. Wade will sleep on the futon and pant’s must be on and zipped at all. Fucking.time.Understand?” Tony asked. Both boys nodded. 

“Good now go get all the stuff we asked for and leave it outside your door.” Steve said.

“This is bullshit” Wade groaned angrily before laying out on Peter’s bed. Peter was sitting on the bed leaning against the wall.

“Language!” Steve called from another room. Wade growled and Peter laughed.

“I think its pretty fair it could be worst” Peter said before crawling closer to him and rubbing circles on the outside of his shirt. 

“How?” 

“They could have said you couldn’t stay here” Peter answered smiling. Wade rolled over on his side and looked at him.

“I’m really sorry about all that stuff I said to you. I didn’t mean any of it. I would never leave you for anyone, and I love the sound of your voice” Peter chuckled and kissed him on the cheek. 

“I know” Wade sat up in surprise.

“You know? How?” He asked. Peter laughed again.

“I have seen your porn history Wade. I know what you like and what you were trying to achieve.”

“Oh” Wade said while lying back down. “Well I see you changed your ring tone” He said trying to get another subject. He didn’t know how he felt about Peter knowing the type of porn he liked. On one hand it was kind of a turn on and on the other it scared him. What if Peter found something that freaked him out? He would never look at him the same again.

“Wade stop. You’re over thinking things like my dad.” Peter chided gently while resuming drawing circles.

“Oh sorry. You didn’t answer my question” 

“No I just have a ring tone for everyone in my contacts” Peter answered.

“Oh really what’s my ring tone?” Peter’s stopped making circles for and he started blushing.

“Just a song. No-nothing important-t” he answered stuttering. Wade smirked into the pillow.

“It’s got to be something important if it has you reacting like this. Why don’t you sing it for me?” He asked.

“Wade no. You know I can’t sing” Peter said.

“Neither can I but I sing for you all the time” Wade persisted. Peter didn’t say anything and Wade thought he was just going to ignore him. Peter sighed and decided what the heck it wouldn’t hurt anyone for him to sing.

“If the past is the problem our future could solve them baby. I could bring you to life if you let me inside baby. It will hurt but in the end you’ll be a man” Peter sang soft enough for only Wade to hear and when he was done Wade rolled over again. 

“That’s a beautiful song” He started. Peter smiled shyly.

“Thanks.”

“But you really can’t sing” Wade said with a light tone. Peter grabbed the pillow and hit him over the head with it laughing.

“I told you that already you, jerk off” Wade put his hands over his face to protect it.

“I know. I should have believed you” He said laughing. Peter stopped hitting him with the pillow and laid down on his chest.

“I love you” He said smiling. Wade began playing with his hair and smiled too.

“I love you too. But the next time your parent’s catch us fucking I’m jumping out the damn window” He said half joking half serious.

“Language!” Steve yelled again

**Author's Note:**

> song list: You are my sunshine-Ricky Nelson
> 
> Mad-Neyo
> 
> Pumped up kicks-FTP
> 
> Mannequin-Katy Perry
> 
> authors note: So my Beta never betad this and I was ready to post it so I did it myself. If you see any mistakes message me and I will fix it. Also where the lines kind of separate different parts is where the location changes


End file.
